The plane had just experienced the usual turbulence and was approaching the airport.

“Thank you for flying Divided Airlines,” the pilot announced over the intercom, “Hope … you fly with us again.

“What the hell did he mean by that!” someone anxiously yelled from the passenger compartment. “Is he not sure we’re going to make it?”

“What are you stupid?” the co-pilot said, smacking the pilot, and pointed to the fine print in the operation manual, which stated that such remarks should be left until after the plane is landed and at the gate. It took the pilot all of 5 seconds to read this, and at 400 miles per hour he missed the runway by exactly 2,933.5 feet.

Roger McManus